December 22nd, 2012... Well, That's a Fail...

Hello, and welcome to December 22nd, 2012: the day after the day the world did not end.

Still wondering why the world didn't end? Well, the short answer is simply that a bunch of crazy people saying the world will end does not simply make the world end. The better answer comes from NASA.

So there you go. The world didn't end yesterday because the whole Mayan "doomsday" thing was just silly nonsense.

(previously...)

December 21st, 2012 is Doomsday!

Unless you've been living under a rock for the last 13 Mayan Baktuns, you're well aware that Friday, December 21st, 2012 will mark the complete and utter end of the world. Faced with the dismal prospects of the complete destruction of Earth and all humankind, many people would simply fall to the floor lamenting their inevitable doom. Rest assured, there is absolutely nothing you can do to alter the immutable fate of our world, preordained over 5,000 years ago (or whatever), but you can at least choose how to spend your last day on Earth.

That's why we're advocating the establishment of a world-wide Doomsday Celebration Extravaganza!

Doomsday is only going to happen once, folks, so don't miss your chance to live it up one last time before the Big Kablooie.

Party Like There's No Tomorrow

That's right, it's time to celebrate the End of Days because... well, why not? You and all your friends and loved ones are going to die anyway, so why not just party it up and have a grand old time while the Four Horsemen rain destruction across the world, Odin calls the Gods of Asgard to battle in Ragnarok, Great Cthulhu rises from the Sunken City of R'lyeh, the Flying Spaghetti Monster smites us all with His Noodly Appendage, or whatever the heck is going to happen.

What You Can Do

Start planning your Doomsday Party today -- after all, there's no time like the present since there really is no future. It'll be your last day on Earth, so make it good one. Spread the Bad News, and tell all your friends and loved ones that you'll be blowing your whole life savings on the biggest, baddest, most spectacular party you've ever thrown!